My Fortunes

As Told By Stale Fortune Cookies, Horror Scopes, and other Insightful Sources

My Favorite, it didn't Happen, but Still my Favorite

LEO (JUL 21 - AUG 21): After years of living by the 8 to 5 schdule, you discover you have much more fun and a lot more money dabbling around with your unique ideas. Let the entrepreneur in you develop this month; by year's end you'll have a great little business. Don't let work schedules push you into a state of exhaustion. While some of your friends drive themselves crazy with false responsibility, you keep your limber and free. Take it easy.

You will travel to many places.

In God we trust; all others must pay cash.

A Double Cookie, Good Omen

Your love life will be happy and harmonious.

Never trouble trouble till trouble troubles you.

You will be fortunate in everything you put your hands to.

You will spend old age in comfort and material wealth.

You will make a fortune with your friend.

Ignorance never settles a question.

You never hesitate to tackle the most difficult problems.

The joyfulness of a man prolongeth his days.

The best profit of future is the past.